Pursuit to my happiness

Late Night Thoughts

Hello all? Hi? 
Anyone up at such an hour? This stuffy nose is devilishly keeping my mind cranking.

 

Ever thought about what you want your life to be like? Who do you want to be in it? Where would you like to be? Who would you prefer to become? What do you want to accomplish? How would you want to spend the rest of your days? I’ve come to realise that at some point this is exactly what I wanted; I wanted to be someone who helped people, I wanted to do research and be happy with finding solutions. I wanted to chase someone who is worth the chase, I wanted a hand full of friends that I know I can count on, I want my siblings to have a beautiful relationship with me, etc., but for some reason today I didn’t feel like this was ‘enough’.

I talked with a good friend of mine, Will, and we talked about our philosophies on life. He said that life is a journey so why would you want to suffer through such a scenic and beautiful path? I agreed with him; Life is a journey. Life is this clusterfuck of emotions, memories, laughs, cries, love, pain, contentment, happiness, depression, passion, sex, intimacy, and a whole lot more–so why wouldn’t you want to choose who and what goes on your journey to make your experience beautiful? It was only moments ago that I realised that I love my life. Today could have been the worst day ever due to car accidents, stress, work, sleep deprivation, sickness, and an empty feeling, but instead I realise that it’s all just a part of life’s journey. I have loyal and amazing friends who make me smile on a day to day basis and I LOVE smiling. I have three or four families I know I can count on if I need something. I am blessed enough to forgive people I’ve hated from years ago. I have the ideal man in my head and I know he exists. I have a dog who gives me kisses! Who doesn’t like dog kisses???? I have a brain that I’m content with and a body I’m beginning to love–even with the self-inflicted scars. 

The point to these fragmented paragraphs are this: I know you know we know where you want to be, so let me help you get there.

XO

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