Pursuit to my happiness

Archive for April, 2012


Body to Body



Every tremor, every flinch

I imagine my tongue caressing your veins.

Your body, 

My body.




Something about the way your limbs move

make me swoon;

Your hips, your mouth, your stomach and arms.

Ever so gently you decide to roll on top of me,

I love to feel your body’s heat.

I notice you look at me.

Your eyes are focused,

so clear and filled with such passionate emotion.



My fingertips touch your stomach,

I listen to you sigh.

Slowly I push my body into yours

and watch the lust appear inside of your eyes.

My lips replace my fingers–tasting you is better.                                

You encourage me to go further,

to tease you.                                        

To please you.



The Trees Are Whispering

Something about a tree has always fascinated me. Although I am easily entertained you have to give it to a tree for being awesome. I don’t know why,but there’s something almost majestic and immortal about a tree; the way they seem to stand still in time, how they grow and provide universal cleanliness to those who breathe, and give us eternal shelter from the hot heat. Of course there are other things that trees do, but I’m not talking about a “basic tree”   I’m talking about those kinds of trees that make you think, make you wonder how such a creation formed in the first place.


 Breathe in its wicked beauty. I’d love to climb that tree and just watch the world for a while. Crooked trees are my favourite. 



Take time out to think what makes you think.


I’ve always wondered if being accepted was really “acceptance“. It sounds really stupid out loud, but in my head it seemed like a bigger question. People look for other individuals for one of two reasons; either we look for like-minded, familiar people, or we look for individuals completely different from ourselves to create a different, more open-minded base. But what happens if neither accept you? What do you do when you feel stuck feeling like you don’t belong in either group?

I knew a girl growing up who was a complete loner because, to her, she felt unaccepted. She felt alienated and struggled each day I knew her to keep what little friends she had. After a while people seemed to welcome her in because they were like-minded; they were angry, they were misfits. I watched Ana evolve into something else, too. I watched her grow soft, for she had soon enough lost her “edge” that made her seem intimidating. Ana was a sweet girl and I never knew why she never let herself show.

About sophomore year of high school she turned completely soft and vulnerable. I’d never seen Ana so timid and dainty almost, but I figured she must have been that way all along she just didn’t want to show it. She found more friends, leaving her old group behind, but she still kind of remained a loner. Towards our senior year I noticed she was much more outgoing, but she was still somehow always alone. She had, yet again, changed her group, and she seemed to be very accepted.

Once we graduated I kept in touch with her. I watched her draw into herself, her friends diminished, her social life was gone, and she always worked. A year later she went off to college and I ran into her one day. I noticed she was so vibrant and happy for once, her friends at college were weird and diverse, she seemed to really like them. As her college years added on I noticed she began to alienate herself again.

I can’t help but feel bad for Ana, it always seems she is so confused on the inside, but on the outside she seems like she has herself “together”.  I finally asked her one day why she’s always alone when it’s obvious people care and love her, her reply was simply “Have you ever thought about everything you’ve been through? Do you ever think there will never be anyone like you?”

My heart ached for this woman.

She’s fairly smart and she has such a big light on the inside. Her eyes light up when she’s actually happy, her soul luminates…I just don’t understand why it’s so hard for her to see how loved and accepted she really is. I think that’s why I’ve always liked Ana, she has this way about her that just draws people to her, but she never realises her talents. I remember some years ago I heard this song coming from her iPod and every time I hear it it reminds me of her. This post is dedicated to a dear friend who just needs a boost of love and acceptance.

You are accepted and you are loved.



The purpose for ventilation is to release things, yes?


Apparently when venting needs to be done people want to get all…”concerned”, yet you can’t read between the lines any other time? Get out of my face, please. I beg you kindly.


Walls. Cold Feet. Penguins?

“Going to bed with cold feet is something you’ve never liked because it’s uncomfortable, and no matter how small you shrink a bed it still gets lonesome. My feet are always cold and I never have any help warming them because I’m always alone. After I shrunk the bed to a twin size I thought I could keep my feet from freezing because of its smaller capacity, but I was wrong. Every night I prayed for warmer feet, but I never got it. I learned to sleep closely to the wall and stare at it glumly until my eyes got heavy; I leaned to ignore my feet staying cold at night. Maybe I should have called for company, or may my ‘company’ wouldn’t have understood. It gets tiring always having cold feet at night; it hurts trying to get accustomed to being left alone again.”


Favourite quote:

Favourite quote:

No regrets


As her hair cascades down…

As her hair cascades down her back she said she wanted more, She shuts her eyes tight as she allows her clothes to fall to the floor. She only wanted to feel. She grits her teeth at the painful sin, but he laughs excitedly. She holds her breath and prays it will end, but he doesn’t let her body free. Alone and confused she falls for it again, the same old type and the same type of man.Maybe one day she can set herself free and watch her dreams fly; but until the day she can escape herself, her only wish is to die.

What we do to feel love…

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